Just because it's the weekend, news does not sleep:  Uncle Sam is adding some beef to its western defenses, a Roman Catholic Cardinal says something remarkably tone deaf about clergy sex abuse, and Ireland is in dire need of another visit by Saint Patrick to deal with the slithery menace on the green.

The United States is bolstering its western anti-missile defenses in response to North Korea’s new belligerence.  Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel announced $1 Billion to ground-based missile interceptor batteries to be located in California and Alaska. 

The Eurozone and International Monetary Fund are agreeing to a $13 Billion bailout to keep Cyprus out of bankruptcy.  They’re asking Cyprus to trim its deficit, shrink its banking sector, and increase taxes in return.

The Roman Catholic Cardinal of South Africa Wilfred Fox Napier has infuriated survivors of clergy sex abuse by claiming that pedophilia is a psychological "illness, not a criminal condition".  Critics say that is the very attitude that enabled the church to shuffle sexually abusive priests from parish to parish without notifying the proper authorities of crimes being committed.

The Vatican is denying allegations that Pope Francis as a younger cleric remained silent during Argentina’s “dirty war” period of right-wing military rule.  Two priests kidnapped by the military government alleged the former Jorge Bergoglio did not protect them.  30,000 people lost their lives during that tumultuous period.

Hundreds of thousands of Venezuelans lined the streets of Caracas for the final funeral procession of the late Hugo Chavez before he was entombed.  The vote for a new president takes places on 14 April.  Until the, Chavez’ handpicked successor Nic Maduro is at the helm.

Spain has begun the process of withdrawing its forces from Afghanistan.  There are currently 1,400 Spanish troops there, but equipment is being moved to the rear and units are being deactivated.  The full withdrawal should be complete by 2014.

Saint Patrick is famous for driving the snakes out of Ireland, but the boom times invited them back in.  As leaner economic times return to the Emerald Isle, people are abandoning the snakes they bought as status symbol pets during the “Celtic Tiger” years.  Authorities say they’ve recently been called to catch a California king snake, a 15-foot python, a corn snake in a trash bin, and an aggressive rat snake found in a shed.  Happy Saint Patrick’s Day Weekend!